New Things and Cheddar Chowder

New beginnings, new hopes, new dreams... new apartment. Yes, I realize how silly it is to devote an entire blog post to the fact that I am once again going to be in my own room and living on my own schedule... Not that this last semester has been terribly trying, (okay, well maybe it has), but simply that I am reveling in my soon to be regained freedom!!
In my head, I think I know that my freedom will come with lots of responsibility, but right now my mind is whirring with all the excitement of freedom and not really thinking about all of that. I remember, but its one of those things that you block out mentally, and don't really factor into your situation when you consider it.
And then there's all the things that I will miss...
Like coming home last night at 10:30 to find a lovely pot of cheddar ham chowder in the fridge just waiting for my hungry stomach. Yeah, and I would just like to go on record and say that my mom makes the absolute BEST chowder EVER! And it is best fresh, but I sure wasn't decrying that fact last night as I slurped down a steaming hot bowl accompanied by a few saltines and some surf time. Yeah, absolutely nothing wrong with that life!
I'm actually really thankful for my living situation this whole last semester. I mean, I don't know what I would have done if my family hadn't been there to kinda kick me in the rear when I was being mopey about being in the States, or keep me from going off the deep end with stress from work. They are great, don't get me wrong. Its just time to move on...
I think I have known that for a while now, but never really wanted to do anything about it. See, I am one of those incredibly lazy people that sees opportunities for growth and maturity... and wants it, but then looks at how much work its gonna take, and is like... uhm, no thanks, maybe some other time.
So when I asked God about this, I hoped He would say yes, expected Him to say no, figured it would be best if He said wait, and dreaded that He would give me the "all systems go". And then He decided to speak...
The reason that I dreaded the yes was clear: I didn't want to put in the effort to grow closer to Him. Not that I don't want the growth, just that I am lazy and don't want to have to go throught the suffering to get there! No getting outside my comfort zone. I didn't want to have to work hard, or be strapped for funds. I still don't. But He said "yes". And more than all my wants and dreams, I need to be walking in His way... and since He has so clearly mapped it for me...
So I am going to miss the chowder, but am looking forward to the new things!