Frank Fashion Talk

Okay, I know this world is not an easy place for us ladies these days. Between what the world tells us to dress like and trying to still look fashionably relevant there is a tremendously fine balance. But seriously ladies... It is time to up the anti!

One thing about Ugandans is that they really like to dress up. Even your taxi or boda driver may wear a suit. But when it comes to the ladies.... Ohhhh my goodness.... Can we just have a sit down talk real fast?

A. Ladies, I realize your skin is dark and you think that things don't show because of this fact... However, this does not, I repeat NOT, give you license to wear sheer shirts with nothing underneath. I will give you the benefit of the doubt if you're power went your as you were dressing this morning and you honestly didn't know how bad this looks, but judging from the quality/quantity of makeup applied, I think this applies to very few of you. Style up ladies... And cover up!

B. Then there is this fad of wearing leggings. Now before you jump down my throat about this because i too wear leggings, let me just say that i actually like them. When used properly, i find them a welcome relief to well covered dressing. So, when are they worn improperly? Any time that your kabina becomes an object of attention. Period. Or as they say in Uganda, full stop.

C. When you go to put on a dress or skirt on the morning, please do a check in the mirror and ask yourself, "have I selected the proper undergarments for this attire?" Almost all dresses or skirts should be worn with accompanying petticoats unless they are very well lined and please make sure that you aren't sporting lines from whatever is below your petticoat! You know what i'm talking about and you've all seen it happen. Please don't make the fatal mistake that so many women seem to make: if you are showing lines don't wear less... Wear more! This is no time for scanty panties or going commando. This ois the time to buy a bigger size or a less clingy material. Just do it ladies!

D. This brings us to the gentlemen.... Oh gentlemen... First of all, we've said this so many times but the fact remains: no one wants to see your boxers peeping. If this means you need to invest in longer than your-little-bros-muscle-shirt shirts... Then please, for the love of all that is pure in this world, do it!

E. Next, stop wearing our skinny jeans! Anything that is not a relaxed fit through the butt and thighs should not be worn by a guy. For OBVIOUS reasons! Please leave some things to our imagination. I have been telling guys this for years, but somehow I keep having to reiterate it as they seem to be very persistent in commuting this fashion sin/eyesore.

F. Now, perhaps a word of praise? Okay... Ladies, especially ladies of Kampala: thank you for wearing dresses. You have restored my faith in my own ability to wear a skirt comfortably. I love the way so many women in Kampala have taken the effort to have well made, well fitted dresses, especially in traditional African fabrics. It warms my heart to see the pride with which they display their own identities. So wear that katenge proudly sisters. You look stunning!

G. Gentlemen, never, and I mean never, underestimate the power and attraction of a well fitted suit. This is not just Barney talking here, I truly mean it. Of course, if you would like to wear a sweatervest instead... I will also heartily approve! (As long as it's not the ugly Christmas sweater variety) For the guys that are already practicing this, kudos!

Thus ends my fashion advice/rant for today. Tune in next time as I talk about natural hair, treated hair, dredlocks, and braids!

If Curiosity Killed

If curiosity killed the cat
Then this feline had enough catnip arsenic
To destroy all nine of her lives
Chasing balls of twine she was never meant to unwind

See it started when she was very young
A few vague ideas planted on a fertile imagination
And they spread like gangrene
Taking her innocent mind along for the vacation
Because what she didn't fully know
And now couldn't ever unlearn
Would eat away at her soul
Pushing her to want a turn
And playing with dolls became a guilty affair
As she acted out scenes
She shouldn't know existed
Till it switched to books in her teens
Cause even if her mother checked most of her novels
There was always some way to sneak one in
And late at night she began to feel things
By day, changed the way she saw men

And her turn finally came
As he spoke sweet nothings in her ears
Whispered empty promises into her soul
And she sold herself cheap for those tears
That would all too ultimately come
Because 'emptiness' can't fill you
And 'nothing' can't satiate
At the end of the day she was still alone
Maybe more so now than ever before
Having tasted the nectar of Eden's love
She was cast out into this hell we call the world

And she turned where all disappointed, starving go
And that was the first time she saw it
Never occurring to her she could have a problem
Cause it's guys who get addicted to this kind of thing
But somehow she kept going back
And slowly the poison spread as it infected
Relationship after relationship
With its screaming yearn for more
The burden of guilt growing heavier and heavier
Every time her eyes settled on the vast store
Til she became the performer not the audience
And plied her trade for the chance
He would find her desirable...
Beautiful... Notice her... Even once

Who's fault is it?
Who is to blame?
Is it the industry or the individuals
Gaining money from barring their shame?

See I want to tell you this story has a happy ending
That the girl found help and healing
But how many people would that be true for?
How many instead lose their feeling?
How many young girls are just like her?
Thrust prematurely into a world they can't cope with
Carrying scars into marriages and relationships
Still looking for that perfect man and myth

And how many of her brothers have it worse?
Locked inside prisons of their own shame
Shackled to things they think they need
Never knowing character or heart or name
And won't they carry these scars as well?
Hurt the very women who love them best
Because there is no competition for an airbrushed pic
And he'll find he can't settle for less

If curiosity killed the cat
Then this feline had enough catnip arsenic
To destroy all her nine lives
Chasing balls of twine she was never meant to unwind

But thank God He saw her in her hurt and her pain
This is one cat that has been saved from the game.

** Uganda recently passed what has been referred to as the "miniskirt" bill in an attempt to curb pornography and indecent exposure within the country. While this may seem a bit strange on a country running rampant with teen pregnancy, HIV infection, and scandalous dressing, I loudly applaud the intentions behind wanting to preserve the original conservative values which have been honored in Africa in the past. May all nations take an example and feel the need to protect innocent lives and hearts from the evils of this dangerous industry.
** For all my brothers and sisters affected by this may I just say that God has not turned His back on you and He loves you yet. There is nothing and no one who can separate you from the love of God and that includes your own shame. Remember that guilt is from the devil and conviction is from God. You can change with His help. Maybe the change won't happen all at once but every day is a decision and you have the power in Christ to be victorious over this life of sin and death!

This Week

This week in Africa...
My tablet, external harddrive, and computer all broke (to varying extents)
I tried to get an apartment and realized that I can't afford it yet
I held like 7 babies and played with many more and realized how badly I want my own
I ran a low grade temp for 3 days and still went to work
I cried, like really cried for the first time this year
I nearly lost my way completely with a very broken heart and then found it again with help from a very unlikely source (the person who started my problems in the first place)
I started reading Walking with God by John Eldredge again... And got reminded how many things I am trying to do on my own without even asking God if it is a good idea

On page 87 this is what I found:
"And so God must, from time to time, and sometimes very insistently, disruptn our lives SO THAT we release our grasping of life here and now. Usually through pain. God is asking us to let go of the things we love and have given our hearts to, so that we can give our hearts even more fully to Him. He that's our attempts to make life work so that our efforts fail, and we must face the fact that we don't really look to God for life."

But that wasn't enough so He thought He would emphasize the point by having me read in Acts chapter 27 about Paul and the shipwreck... Interestingly, God told Paul that the only way for every life to be spared was for them to stay with the ship, no matter how bad the seas got. Act 27:25 " So keep up your courage, men, for I have faith in God that it will happen just as he told me.". Its like He was also whispering in my ear... "The storm is bad, but I'll bring you through this if you hold steady and stay with Me." But the verse continues, "Nevertheless, we must run aground on some island." There may be worse to come, but somehow those few simple words spoke to my heart well enough for me to be able to pick myself up and continue on.

Thanks for reading, hope you were encouraged with what God has been teaching me, and mob love my peeps!

Nursing African Style

Well after my extensive sabbatical from writing on blogger, this will no doubt come as a shock to you that I am taking time today to update you, my dear readers on a little of my life.
Of course I had started out with very good intentions of routinely updating you all on all my African adventures, but one thing led to another and its very easy to find myself feeling too busy or too tired to write. Its not as if this is the only form of communication I use and by the time I am done updating facebook and instagram pictures, writing an email to my Mom or sisters, writing in the diary, prayer journalling, and keeping up on all my facebook messages from friends about the only writing I want to do is post a silly anecdote to twitter and call it a day. Somehow 140 characters seems much more manageable than an entire blog post.
Anyway, I am here today, so aside from the obvious apology which I've just made (and yes, it did sound more like excuses, oh well), let me just say that I have missed writing for you all, maybe as much as you have missed reading.
At present my heart and mind are too full to narrow down many stories for this page though, so let me just tell you a little about my nursing experience of late.
I have been working, as an orientation period for my nursing license, in the National Referral Hospital here in Kampala, called Mulago. I have worked on Medical and just finished Surgical rotations this last week. I have been so surprised by the tremendously warm welcome I received from the nurses on the wards (and the doctors, interns, and pharmacists for that matter) and their attitude towards me. Its truly been a blessing to get to know and work alongside these valuable health care professionals.
My first day I managed to faint during rounds, but they immediately came to my rescue and looked after me ever since. (I guess it was the closed room and standing too long... i don't know)
My favorite moment was when this last week one of the nurses said of me, "But Joanna, she fits in everywhere. She eats our food, doesn't complain about the work, she even has our accent; she just fits in. I think she's actually African."
Now people tell me that I am "actually African" all the time. I have my hair braided, and I got an nurses uniform that looks like theirs. My general philosophy is: "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." The thing that I loved about this is that this sounds so close to what I picture Jesus would look like working on a hospital ward in Africa. He would just be Emmanuel, God with us. He would eat our food, talk like we talk, work hard, and shine light wherever He went.
Now I hope what she said is true and yet humbly admit that there are days I am nothing like Jesus on that ward. There are days all I want to do is sit down and there are days when I complain about the other nurses leaving me with too much work when I'm not even paid. But there are days when I get to smile or pat the hand of a patient, have them actually thank me for giving them an injection, or whisper a prayer as I go about my work and I feel that I really am being a light on that ward.
Those are the good days. Those are the days I want to remember. Those are the days I want to replicate. Those are the days I want to live.

Hubris

I have learned a new word from my Ugandan friends. The word is hubris. Webster defines it as:: exaggerated pride or self-confidence
So amount my small group of friends we have a running game going of giving people points for things that they say that are overtly self confident. I would like to say that I'm not currently in the lead, but Aki and I wrote this poem for our friend Patrick for his birthday, so.... Well you be the judge...

''We were thinking just the other day
And we hope you realize how lucky you are to have us in your life
In fact the more we thought about it
We aren't even sure how you survived all these years without knowing us
It's hard to imagine a single day of yours without us in it
Just think how sad and dismal that would be.
Surely you must realize by now how rare it is to find
Two girls with such excellent character
And what a true privilege it is to call them friends.
Not to mention this deadly combination of style and beauty is not easily found on any catwalk
And you get to keep us here on your arm making YOU look good.
Some men would call that heaven,
You get to call it your life.
So it's understood that daily mention should be made of how generally awesome we are.

Oh yeah and vice versa.''

When I Fail to Write

So I realize that it has been exceptionally long since I've posted anything on here and in the interest of good authorship I thought I should correct this inexcusable mistake. This is therefore my attempt to rectify that situation and also to pull some meaning from the last several weeks of my life.
First of all I should let you know that I am still not an official Ugandan nurse much to my chagrin. However I know that God's timing and plans are much better than my own so I will wait on Him.
In the meantime I am still working with my friend Aki doing decoration work for kwajulas and weddings. This last weekend we had a very muddy kwajula in Jinja. So many things went wrong it was almost comical if it hadn't pushed our time frame back so far that we weren't sure we could complete the decor on time. Then I got a migraine and ended up having to lie down for a while. It appeared to have passed, but as soon as I got up I had to rush to the side of the bush and lost everything I had that day. Needless to say I felt much better after that, but was still weak into the next day. We slept on the floor that night waiting for the tents to be done so we could complete our work on the insides. The next day dawned bright and early with lots to get done and we tackled it with zest. We actually managed to complete everything, but Aki and I were so worm out that we didn't even have the energy to attend the function like we were originally planning. Needless to say, we were in need of the relaxing day we had planned for Sunday. It was a friend's birthday and since we were already in Jinja we figured that we would make it a long weekend and do some sightseeing.
We got to go to the source of the Nile river and learned about is discovery. It's sad actually, there used to be a beautiful waterfall at the head of the Nile where it flows from lake Victoria, but they put ina dam for hydroelectricity and raised the water level the whole 15 meters over the waterfall, covering it completely. This also disrupted the rapids downstream which used to be one of the top places in the world door destination white water tag rafting. Now I support, in general, hydroelectricity as a clean and renewable source of energy, but when it comes to changing the natural landscape in such a manner, I find it a bit sad and a teensy bit irresponsible.
Anyway we got to go and stand at the edge of where the falls were and you can tell from the current there where they were.
I'll try post some pictures as soon as my computer is out of the shop and hopefully you can all empty them. I had never been east in Uganda except to Mwiri so it was fun to see a little different side of the country.
I

Let's Write a Poem

Let's write a poem.

Let's make it say everything that we've been thinking and feeling

Let's put in all our disappointments and our joys

Let's spread am ample amount of fear for the future and regret for the past

Let's season it with the bliss of a first kiss and the excitement of a little one's arrival

Let's put in all the words we should have been saying to one another all along

Let's speak of noble things

Let's tell of change for our generation

Let's inspire hope of a better tomorrow

Let's be a voice for the one who has none and advocate for the downtrodden

Let's put all this down on paper

Let's give it a stunning title to make people think

Let's fill it full of alliterating prose and Oxford words

Let's fuse intelligence with eloquence

Let's blend the wisdom of the streets with the fullness of a library

Let's twist our thoughts into new written ideas

Let's empathize, emphasize, epigrammatize, enfranchise, equalize, essentialize, and epitomize 

Let's give them something so unique that they snap to their feet

Let's write a poem.