goodbye

Every once in a while, when you make bold statements... you really should follow through on them.

its not regret
but it is remorse
i knew better
but i let my imagination run wild
it was a fate worse than death
knowing separation
from Him who loves me best
and i chose it
but no more
i'm saying no this time
as easy as that
i may be looked at as cruel
but i can't keep on in this
there's no good time to say goodbye
but there is a time
now

and soon the freedom will follow
as it always does
clean as the tulips in my yard
washed in the drizzling rain
as a tear falls
and keeps washing
all the pain
all the worry
all the sense of distance
and i'm there
at my Father's feet
and as i lift my hesitant, tearful eyes
i see His beautifully kind ones looking down at me
and i don't see reproach
i see longing
and then i am in His arms
full embrace

i think about taking one last look
but sodom and gomorrah is not worth even that
no turning back
kiss it goodbye