desperately, i need You

okay, this post might get a little nitty-gritty, so consider yourself forewarned.

i was talking to my lovely roomie the other day about when we want God the most. and how interestingly enough it seems to directly correspond with when we need Him to get through every day. and strange thing... He seems to bless us more when we are consistently seeking Him every day. at least it seems that way in my life.
so i was telling her about when i was in africa and how i woke up every morning and read my bible, and every night before i fell asleep it was the last thing that i looked at (and yes, i'm a dork, but i totally fell asleep with it in the bed next to me with my hand resting on it!). weird i know, but that is how much i felt that i needed God during that time. and the joy that got lavished on me was frankly... AMAZING! i don't even know how i would have made it through that time without Him renewing me every day like that.
anyway, so i was saying to her that i wish i still felt that i needed God that desperately. and the sad thing is that I DO. i need Him every day in soooo many ways, and yet i've grown appathetic to the fact that i am in desperate need of Him in my life. which... *cough, cough*... has made me rather blind to small pockets of sin occuring rather blatantly in my life. thankfully, He is really good at reminding me to come back to Him, and He restores freely when we ask.

anyway, so now i am asking Him to restore me to the place where i realize my desperateness to Him for everything in my life. do you need to too? i talked to one of my really good friends the other day, and it was so hard to talk to her, because i recognized this same struggle in her life. her main complaint was that she was just so bored, and she wanted an adventure. when did we get the idea that God is not a God of adventure?? who planted that lie? all i could think to tell her was that she was missing the very source of where her adventure should be coming from! the amazing thing is that we are so discontent most of the time, and yet we look at God and believe that lie that says He won't really change that in our lives. i know how many time i have been guilty of that very thing. but then... when i'm living in Him. i forget that whole silly discontent/bored/unhappy thing and just am fully alive again! and its so beautiful! why don't i run back to it all time? do you?

desperate